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There’s not a lot left of last night’s dream, but here’s what there is:

I was at a carvery, that looked like the kind of cafe you get inside a department store, but the layout was a little odd. After picking up a plate you then had to go around taking your vegetables off other people’s plates. Bizarrely, no one minded about this, but every table I went to I heard diners exclaim “Look at the hygiene! It’s so hygienic!”.

I finally saw what everyone was getting excited about. In order to get the meat, you had to queue up to go past an airport security style desk, where you were checked for condiments, through a shower (with your plate of veg) and then put on hospital scrubs before joining the final queue for the meat. After that you simply exited via a little white swinging gate, with a plate of roast beef and soggy but sterilised vegetables.